Few days back I read an article in TOI on "public display of affection" in which a married couple was put behind bars and released on bail as they did the crime of kissing each other on a local metro station. Well I really find it ridiculous and miserable incident on our part. The SENA people, which claims to be fighting a cultural war against what it calls WESTERN INFLUENCE. I don't understand what are these people up to………they talk about Indian culture and a decent society, for them a couple holding hands on a street draws more attention than a beggar's body on the side walk. On one hand they talk of women's liberalization at the other side they really feel proud conducting ridiculous activities at public places. The Mangalore incident was really heinous conduct……I mean I really don't understand why do a married couple need a sanction from the rest of the world to share a kiss in public???? Its their life…..their feelings….who are these people to decide what others should do?? One really don't have right to impose his rules to others. According to them Valentine's day has never been a part of Indian culture …..and now they are imposing restrictions on married couples…..this is really SAD!!!!! When did our culture say that we should not celebrate love…….we can celebrate love for our country, our parents, why can't we celebrate love for our partners??? I feel pity because the ordinary people don't take anystand……….
"Generally, we understand tradition in terms of a few conservative texts and the other books which give a more liberal views of our tradition and culture are just taught in patches" ,Well ultimately we common people have to take a stand to win
this culture war but before this, it has to be fought and won in mind
100% true !!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteyaar saachi...
ReplyDeleteif someone is sharing love with their love ones whats bad in that...
they are considering PDA as illigal ... crime
as if it is spreading violence
& whatever happened to the Freedom of Expression !
ReplyDeleteGood one :)
ya yaar very true...n its really very sad if they r considering it as a crime...
ReplyDeleteppl in kolkata need ths permission waala funda........else all oders mst go ahead wid wateva thy wanna do in public :P
ReplyDelete(i hope u got my indication :))
well said shilpi, u have written all my thoughts and feelings into dis.... if we can realy do smthin about it, dat would be the genuine step for love birds :)
ReplyDeleteyar its really true,i dont think that's a crime.everyone has right to do whatever he/she wants
ReplyDeleteyar its 100% true.i think everyone has right to do anything.ND kisi KO kisi Ki life me interfere kerne ka koi right hi nhi h........yar tune to mostly mere thought likh diye h.......
ReplyDeletei agree with most of ur points over here except a few ...... the main point itself [showing public affection]....
ReplyDeleteLets leave the case of these shits RamSena or whoever it is who have no basic idea but to create a hype over these things and come over in the news.... But my point is we Indians have a tradition which does neither oppose the principle of public affection nor support that .... The tradition has come from within the society where our affections are confined to our homes .... I don't say its a crime but showing affection by hugging might be the upper limit rather than going for the kissing ....
This is my opinion .. not to say u r wrong Shilpi.... Anywayz I liked the post and keep the good work going
A new follower of ur blog and a wellwisher ..... Keep Smiling
[:O][:O][:O]
ReplyDeleteabe tu itni serious baatein bhi karti hai???[:O]
"I mean I really don't understand why do a married couple need a sanction from the rest of the world to share a kiss in public????"
ReplyDeletefor this point of yours, I think Sarath has very beautifully explained what I wanted to say. Displaying our affection for our loved ones can be considered as good only if its in limits of decency. Now this definition of "decency" is also different for different societies. For the Americans kissing in public maybe allowed, but think of Indian society. Isn't it a taboo? We love doesn't mean we cross our limits. Take the case of Akshye-Twinkle zip case. They do whatever they wish in their bedroom. But in public they need to have some restrain over themselves.
"I have freedom of speech" doesn't mean i can go and abuse others. Does it?
"I have freedom of expression" doesn't mean i can whatever i wish. It doesn't mean i could cross the limits of decency set by society.
And believe me, society doesn't include the ill-minded people like the fews who did mangalore incident. It was a cheap act which was done for some political mileage.
If we think society includes such people, we need to change our perception.
Society is composed of people like us. And so for betterment of our future generations and for preservation of our culture and traditions, we need to sacrifice few "unwanted" desires and whims of ours.
The point is not about having and enjoying your own freedom, rather it is about enjoying your freedom while respecting the freedom and comfort of others as well, while respecting the culture of others as well.
ReplyDeleteOf course a couple should be allowed to express their momentarily feelings and enjoy their freedom, but the couple should also know that it is their own, it is their own responsibility to respect the culture, where they actually, are at the moment. And this thing happens everywhere. Suppose you are working in a company with a team of 10, and you are being all selfish, just worrying about you and not caring about the others and their feeling, sooner or later rest of the 9 will become against you.
I dont mean that you should bar couple from kissing, all I mean is that couples should act according to the place they are. If you are in village, you live accordingly, if you are in city, if can live that way, if you are in cali, you live like that and if in paris you live like that, and if in brazil, you live like that .... for example, nudity is legal in brazil bt not in america, it does not mean that a brazilian citizen can come to america, do nudity and claim its freedom. he will have to avoid nudity, just to respect the culture of another country. It is not only about being liberal, it is about being liberal while respecting the limits of your own and respecting the freedom, emotions and cultures of others.
Try drinking and eating meat with an american, if they know that your religion and culture does not allow it, they would think something like this --- "you eat meat and drink every weekend,you are completely westernized, breaking the faith of your own culture and religion, not respecting them at all" . point is that .. accepted that there are some bad things in our culture, but in the shadow of that forgetting good ones will lead us to lose our own identity. it is better to respect its good things ... i dont know if m right or wrong .. just my views that boiled and i penned down
Hello!
ReplyDeleteAs far as public display of affection goes, I think we are all mature enough to understand where to draw the line and though I completely disagree with someone like the Shiv Sena assuming the responsibility to monitor people,I do believe that kissing in public is something the Indian Society isn't quite prepared to accept yet. Imagine yourself walking down a street with your grandpa or parents and then all of a sudden the couple right in front of you starts kissing passionately.. won't you feel awkward?
Holding hands and all is perfectly fine but there has to be a line drawn. People sometimes present the argument that if two people love each other they are free to do whatever they want to do in public.. but I'm sure you don't want them to be having sex in public.. do you?
Overall a very nice topic by you, presented skilfully. Would love to read more and don't take the comment personally.. it's just an opinion.
Cheers!
A beggar's bare body evokes sympathy because he is helpless but in other cases, it invokes embarrassment.
ReplyDeleteWould you like to see a couple kissing on the road while you are with your family??
Of course I don't approve of putting such couples behind the bars...but yes there is code of conduct to be followed at every place.
Like a person should not pee on the streets even in a case of emergency, similarly couples should restrain from expressing their love in public, however strong their feelings might be.
@Shilpi- I liked ur posts...keep it up!! :)